Letting Love In

The thing about life is, it's always changing. It never stays the same. Therefore, we must change with it.

Almost a year ago, my youngest sister wanted to meet for lunch. Or something like that. But I wasn't feeling it. At that point, it had been almost 9 years since I had last seen her. And honestly, my heart was not in the right place for reconnecting.

I've struggled a lot with siblings in the past. The last 2 years, they've tested me more times than I'd like to admit. Generally, they've just hurt me. And I just wasn't in the place to deal with another round of hurt. Not from a sibling at least.

But yesterday, my heart melted a little. Maybe it was the news about Tatie. Or the fact that I've been surrounded by this amazing family. My boss' family. And you feel all the love. And I said to myself, "I want that relationship. I want to be close to at least one of my siblings. I want to trust them."

So I extended the invitation. At least the thought of it. Plans are not finalized. But the wheels are in motion. And I have a little secret to tell you. I'm super excited about it! I really want to see my big sister. I want to reconnect. I want to have a relationship with her.

It may sound crazy. Or like I'm nuts. But I do want these relationships. I was raised as an only child. And honestly, most of my siblings would rather I die right here, right now, than to even talk to me. But I've learned. In 28 years, that it's not about me. It's about family situations.

So if there is a way, to just build one healthy relationship, I'm going to try. I want that. I want to have someone to share life with. To include in my family. I want a sibling to share with. Most of all, I just want a chance with my big sister. ♫